The upside of a wellbeing downturn

It really is okay not to have it together all of the time lovely. We are often too hard on ourselves but simply knowing that our wellbeing will waiver as we experience life is reassuring because it means we are human beings!
Rhiannon in New York

Recently I was out for dinner with some friends (who are also business owners) and I was sharing with them how my wellbeing had taken a dive a couple of months ago after doing some work that didn’t go as planned. After sharing my story with them they said to me, “Rhi, you have to share your experience because you are someone who always looks like you have it together and others will benefit from knowing that you don’t!”


So, here’s what happened!



Earlier this year I had taken on a work contract, which on paper, sounded great. But once I had commenced the work I realised it was not so great at all.

This is something I really struggled with as I thought it was going to be right up my alley but it was far from it. I was right in the thick of it and I didn’t want to let anyone down.


Over the next few weeks my wellbeing was beginning to suffer. I was out of wellbeing alignment (which felt awful) and I was struggling. As a result, I was getting frustrated over little things that usually wouldn’t worry me. I was arguing with my husband (over silly things) and I snapped at a family member whose energy wasn’t great but because my energy was down too – we clashed! 

My happiness is my priority (and my responsibility) but after a couple of weeks into the new contract, my wellbeing was suffering and I was far from being in my happy place! I had to take action but was still unsure how to best navigate the situation.


The final straw came when I was driving with my son and he turned and said to me,

“Mum what’s going on with you? You don’t seem as happy or easy going as you usually are!”

Ouch, like a smack in the face – he had just verbalised how I’d been feeling for the past few weeks and he was so right! I replied, “Yes I know, I’m not enjoying some work that I’m doing and it’s negatively impacting everything else. I’m finding it challenging, I’m sorry. Being happy is my priority so I will take action and I’ll get my wellbeing back on track soon. I promise.”  


The next day I emailed the lady who was in charge of the contract and said that I will finish up after the next session and I will no longer be available after that time. It was really tough but my happiness and wellbeing are my priority and nothing is worth jeopardising it. I felt instant relief and knew that I had made the best decision not only for me but for my family, too!


So, lovely mum, I definitely don’t have it together all the time, my wellbeing fluctuates too.

I have everyday challenges, just like we all do but that’s life, right?! I’m always honest about how I’m travelling but just in case you did happen to think that I have it together all the time – please know that I don’t – I’m 100% human just like you. Yes, I have learnt (and grown) so much over the past ten years while on my wellbeing journey and I’m much better at getting my wellbeing back on track when it strays but nevertheless my wellbeing does still move about.


Noticing when you are out of alignment and then taking positive action is key!

Be sure to be kind to yourself in the process and don’t berate yourself for being off track. Simply notice where you are and decide to shift it back on track. These experiences are actually quite beneficial (and normal) because it provides you with the opportunity to clarify what matters most to you and reaffirm what you want for your life.


Beautiful mum, even though it doesn’t feel like it when you are smack bang in the middle of a wellbeing struggle, going through it is actually a wonderful (and very normal) part of life. A few months on from my challenge, my wellbeing has elevated to a higher level because the experience helped me reiterate what matters most to me and I’m more committed than ever to prioritising my happiness. Your wellbeing really does need to be your priority. It’s your responsibility and when you are nurturing it, not only do you benefit but all those around you benefit enormously too.  


Rhi xo


Let's Connect


Jade McKenzie
LOVE this so much Rhi! It's amazing how our circumstances can slowly overtake our everyday lives and before you know it - you're stuck in the middle wondering how it all happened! Thanks for sharing, it reminds us all that it's a practice that takes work! xxx
Thanks so much Jade! You hit the nail on the head for sure ... and yes it's absolutely an ongoing practice. Being aware and checking in with ourselves regularly is so important. Thanks for sharing your thoughts lovely. Xo 
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Melissa Jeffcott
This is a great read Rhi. I have been struggling with a health issue the past few weeks, and at a time wellbeing should be my absolute priority, I have also let it slide. A great reminder to get my priorities straight and ditch the 'busy mum' excuse! xxx
Oh thanks SO much for sharing that Mel and I love that you're ditching the 'busy mum' excuse! :) As mums, it is so easy to let our wellbeing slide (even when we know we should prioritise it) because we always have so much going on! We are all in it together lovely and I look forward to hearing how you go nurturing your wellbeing over the coming weeks. XO 
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