The Upside of a Wellbeing Downturn

It really is okay not to have it together all of the time beauty. Yes, it's true ... we're often too hard on ourselves however simply knowing that our wellbeing will waiver as we experience life, reassures us that we're human beings. You, me, we are all human beings.
Rhiannon in New York

A year ago, I was out for dinner with some friends (who are also business owners) and I was sharing with them how my wellbeing had taken a dive a couple of months ago after doing some work that didn’t go as planned. After sharing my story with them they said to me, “Rhi, you have to share your experience because you are someone who always looks like you have it together and others will benefit from knowing that you don’t!”


So, here’s what happened!

Early last year, I'd taken on a work contract, which on paper, sounded great however once I had commenced the work I realised it was not so great at all.

This is something I really struggled with as I thought it was going to be right up my alley but it was far from it. I was right in the thick of it and I didn’t want to let anyone down.


Over the next few weeks my wellbeing was beginning to suffer. I was out of wellbeing alignment (which felt awful) and I was struggling. As a result, I was getting frustrated over little things that usually wouldn’t worry me. I was arguing with my husband (over silly things) and I snapped at a family member whose energy wasn’t great but because my energy was down too – we clashed! 

My happiness is my priority (and my responsibility) but after a couple of weeks into the new contract, my wellbeing was suffering and I was far from being in my happy and fulfilled place! I had to take action however I was unsure how to best navigate the situation.


The final straw came when I was driving with my son and he turned and said to me,

“Mum what’s going on with you? You don’t seem as happy or easy going as you usually are!”

Ouch, like a smack in the face – he had just verbalised how I’d been feeling for the past few weeks and he was so right! I replied, “Yes I know, I’m not enjoying some work that I’m doing and it’s negatively impacting everything else. I’m finding it challenging, I’m sorry. Being happy is my priority so I will take action and I’ll get my wellbeing back on track soon. I promise.”  


The next day I emailed the lady who was in charge of the contract and said that I will finish up after the next session and I will no longer be available after that time. It was really tough but my happiness and wellbeing are my priority and nothing is worth jeopardising it. I felt instant relief and knew that I had made the best decision not only for me but for my family, too!


So beauty, I definitely don’t have it together all the time, my wellbeing waivers too.

I have everyday challenges, just like you do because I'm human and that’s life, right?! I have challenges that I navigate and move through, this is a normal part of the human experience. In fact, I now choose to embrace these periods knowing that I'm learning and growing exponentially, and I wouldn't change one lesson that I've acquired on my 15-year everyday wellbeing journey. The only difference between then and now is that now I'm excellent at guiding my wellbeing back on track when it strays from my where I want it to be.


Noticing when you're out of alignment and then taking positive action is key!

Be sure to be kind to yourself in the process and don’t berate yourself for being off track. Simply notice where you are and decide to shift it back on track. These experiences are actually quite beneficial (and normal) because it provides you with the opportunity to clarify what matters most to you and reaffirm what you want for your life. You can learn to relax into these moments and feel yourself expand. This is emotional literacy in action. 


Beautiful mum, even though it doesn’t feel like it when you're smack bang in the middle of a wellbeing struggle, going through it is actually a beautiful (and very normal) part of life. Eighteen months on from my challenge, my wellbeing has elevated to a higher level because the experience helped reiterate what matters most to me and I’m more committed than ever to prioritising my happiness. 

Make your wellbeing your priority. It’s your personal responsibility and when you're nurturing it, not only do you benefit but all those around you benefit enormously too.  


Rhi xo


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